Can Lovers Cheat? 💔 | Understanding Covenant, Commitment & Faithfulness
- Stonepoint Community Church
- Mar 15
- 3 min read
“Can people cheat and still love you?” This is a question that many wrestle with, and in this week’s message, we dove deep into what God’s Word says about love, fidelity, and the true meaning of commitment.
💔 The Myth of Love and Cheating
Many believe that love and cheating can coexist—that someone can love their partner and still betray them. But the reality is cheating is not just about physical acts; it’s about a lack of regard for covenant and commitment.
2 Samuel 11 tells the story of King David and Bathsheba. David, a man after God’s own heart, allowed his desire to lead him into adultery. Instead of honoring his commitments, he manipulated, deceived, and ultimately had Bathsheba’s husband, Uriah, killed to cover his tracks. This wasn’t just a failure of the flesh; it was a failure of the heart.
💍 Covenant vs. Casual Relationships
One hard truth: if you’re not married, you can’t be cheated on.
Why? Because biblical cheating is a violation of covenant. Marriage is the only relationship where a person has made a spiritual, legal, and lifelong commitment before God and others.
The world has blurred the lines between casual and covenant relationships, leading to unrealistic expectations. People engage in covenant behaviors without covenant commitments and then wonder why betrayal feels so devastating. You can’t expect covenant faithfulness from someone who never made a covenant promise.
🙏 Faithfulness Is About Character, Not Just Love
Proverbs 20:6 asks, “Most men will proclaim everyone his own goodness: but a faithful man who can find?”
Faithfulness isn’t about just claiming to be good—it’s about unwavering commitment to one’s word and people.
The Bible makes it clear:
A whoremonger is someone who engages in sexual sin without marriage.
An adulterer is someone who violates their marriage vows by seeking intimacy outside of the covenant.
Hebrews 13:4 tells us “Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge.”
A faithful man or woman doesn’t stay committed just when it’s convenient. They keep their vows even when the emotions they made them in have faded.
🚩 Why People Cheat
Many assume that infidelity is only about desire, but it’s deeper than that. Studies show:
70% of men and women say they would have an affair if they knew they wouldn’t get caught.
55% of people admit to having cheated at some point in their lives.
56% of men who cheated claimed they were “happily married.”
These numbers reveal that cheating is not always about dissatisfaction but often about entitlement, opportunity, and lack of accountability.
🛡️ Guarding Against Infidelity
Infidelity doesn’t happen overnight—it happens through small compromises over time.
The Reverend Billy Graham once said, “It’s hard to be intimate with a woman you’re never alone with.”
That’s why guardrails are crucial:
Avoid unnecessary alone time with the opposite sex.
Be transparent in your conversations and interactions.
Refuse to entertain emotional connections outside of your marriage.
Guard your time, your conversations, and your emotions.
⚠️ The Cost of Cheating
Proverbs 6:26 warns, “By the means of a harlot a man is reduced to a piece of bread.”
Cheating doesn’t just damage relationships—it destroys integrity, reputation, and trust. The Bible is clear:
Infidelity wounds deeply. (Proverbs 6:33)
The consequences linger far beyond the act.
The pain of betrayal is often harder to heal than the act itself.
💎 God’s View on Faithfulness
When David stole Uriah’s wife, God didn’t even call her Bathsheba—He called her “the wife of Uriah” (Matthew 1:6).
Even generations later, God did not erase the violation of that covenant. That’s how seriously He takes faithfulness.
But here’s the hope: there is grace for both the betrayed and the betrayer.
If you have been cheated on, know that your worth is not diminished by someone else’s lack of character.
If you have been unfaithful, repentance is the first step to healing, but accountability must follow.
Final Thoughts
God designed relationships to reflect His unwavering love and faithfulness. Cheating is not just about a moment of temptation; it is about a disregard for the sacred nature of covenant.
If we want stronger marriages, stronger families, and stronger churches, we must be people of integrity—honoring our commitments and protecting the covenants we make.
Faithfulness is a choice. Choose today to honor God, honor your word, and honor the ones you love.
Join Us for the Full Series!
If you’re ready to transform your relationships and deepen your understanding of God’s plan, stay tuned for the next few weeks, continuing March 16th at 11:15am, of The Elephant in the Bedroom: ELLIE – An Expose. You’ll gain practical wisdom, biblical truths, and new perspectives on everything from overcoming trauma to building strong, God-centered relationships.